Some men (and I am proud to say I am one of them) can "get it on" for hours at a time. Endurance, stamina... its all good.
So to me its mindboggling that the "average man" can only have sex for 5 minutes before ejaculating. Because that means if there's other men like myself who can go for hours... there must be the reverse... men who can only last mere seconds.
Obviously in that case it can't be a matter of just being in a rush. No "wham bam thank you mam" in that scenario... these poor suckas can't hold it together long enough for the time it takes to brush your teeth.
But there is good news on the horizon. A new drug called Priligy, also known as dapoxetine, allows men to last approx. 3 times longer during intercourse. Clinical trials of Priligy involving men with a mean time of 0.9 minutes from penetration to ejaculation showed the drug increased time before orgasm by an average of three minutes.
Spokesperson Dr. Thom Van Every expects the drug to become as popular as Viagra and is ideal for men who orgasm within the first 2 minutes of penetration... aka sufferers of premature ejaculation.
Right now the pill is pretty expensive. It costs approx. $117 CDN (76 British pounds) to purchase on Lloydspharmacy.com's online drug store. The pill was only released and became available today, but already the company has thousands of applications.
“There’s a lot of pressure to be good in bed,” says Dr. Thom Van Every, who received heart-rending applications from men seeking online consultations, which are required before the drug can be prescribed. The men complained, “I worry that I can’t satisfy my partner” and “My previous relationship ended because of premature ejaculation.”
The drug in question is also an antidepressant, so it boosts self-confidence too. An useful thing in bed. It needs to be taken 2 to 3 hours before for it to become useful.
Although this is the first drug licensed as a treatment for premature ejaculation, doctors have long known that antidepressants can delay orgasm and have been prescribing them “off label” for years now.
Dapoxetine is a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor, similar to Zoloft and Prozac, which affect neurological functions. Doctors aren’t quite sure how they delay orgasm, but the effect is well-documented.
30% of men experience premature ejaculation, not all the time in most cases, but some of the time. Other recommended treatments include topical lotions containing anesthetic as well as condoms and special exercises.
Priligy is awaiting approval from the U.S. Food and Drug Administration and isn't available in Canada yet either.
Health Canada could not confirm whether it has received an application to license the drug.
I think (and this is purely my belief) that premature ejaculation is the result of lack of sexual confidence and control. If these poor men simply had more confidence in their abilities they'd be able to last longer. Knowing when to slow down a bit, take it easy, get more practice, enjoy some kama sutra positions would certainly help in my opinion.
Those exercises might be useful for regular or above average men too, those that want to last even longer. In which case that should make a lot more happy couples.
Control Premature Ejaculation with the Start/Stop Technique
Learning to control premature ejaculation without the use of drugs or desensitizers involves learning to read the signals your body is giving you, knowing when you are about to ejaculate, and pulling back from that point. The technique below is my variation on the common “start/stop technique”. Before you begin you should take some time to understand the basics of premature ejaculation, a bit about male sexual response, and what Kegel exercises are.
Time Required: The most important part of these exercises is to practice (daily if possible).
1.Use a stroking technique.
Begin masturbating by stroking your penis up and down. This is the best method for these exercises as it most closely approximates penetration. Don’t think about premature ejaculation or trying to last longer. Just pay attention to the physical sensations in your penis and pelvic area as your masturbating.
2.Try to notice the “tickling” sensation prior to ejaculation.
As you get close to ejaculation pay particular attention to the physical sensations in your body. Try to notice the “tickling” sensation that occurs just before you ejaculate. Once you know what that feeling is like, you can concentrate on the feelings that occur just before this stage, when it is still possible to stop ejaculation.
3.Get comfortable recognizing the “tickling” sensation.
Continue masturbating without trying to last longer or think of anything special. Just pay close attention to how your body feels as you become more excited, and to recognizing the “tickling” feelings. Do this for at least the next three times you masturbate. Don’t stop yourself from ejaculating, just try to recognize the “tickling” feeling, and the feeling in your body just before the tickling feeling.
4.Start and stop masturbating to learn control.
Once you can tell when the “tickling” sensation is going to come you’re ready to begin the exercises. Try to avoid fantasizing more than necessary, and don’t use lubricant or sex toys while doing these exercises (they’re great, but they’ll come later).
5.Begin stimulation while paying close attention to the physical sensations in your body.
Masturbate until you start to feel turned on and have an erection. Then stop the stimulation for at least 15 seconds and concentrate on the feelings of decreasing excitement in your body. Notice how your penis and pelvic area feel, and how that changes when you stop stimulation. Notice how the rest of your body feels.
6.Continue until you get close to the “tickling” sensation.
Begin to masturbate again, and continue to start and stop periodically until you feel you are getting as close to the “tickling” stage as possible. When you feel yourself getting close stop until you feel you are back in control. Some men find that doing and Kegel squeezes helps them get back in control.
7.Don't worry if you lose your erection.
You may lose your erection when you stop the stimulation, but just start again. You may need to use fantasy to get excited again, but once you're turned on, try to focus on your body. Bring yourself close to the tickling point three times. After this you can just masturbate until you ejaculate.
8.Pay close attention to your body, and repeat this exercise daily.
You may find it difficult to do these exercises at first. You may lose your erection, your mind may wander, you might get bored. But try to stay with it, and practice this daily. As you do, two things will happen. First, the length of time you have to wait to regain control will gradually decrease. Second, the length of time you can continue stimulation between stops will increase.
9.Visualize your sexual response.
Look at the diagram on this page which gives a visual representation of the start and stop technique. Each time you stop stimulating yourself try to picture your body responding as if on this graph.
10.Build up the number of times you stop.
Increase the number of times you stop stimulating yourself until you have reached six. Once you can do the entire exercise ( stimulating yourself just before the “tickling” point, stopping stimulation until you regain control, and then starting again) six times, begin to practice this daily.
11.Use a good lubricant.
Once you’re feeling confident with the exercises, and are able to stop six times, you can increase the stimulation, and the usefulness of the exercises by using a good oil or water based personal lubricant. Because this is only for masturbation, an oil based lubricant is fine to use (but not safe for use with condoms, and not recommended for use in vaginal penetration).
12.Using the lubricant to simulate penetration, start the exercise.
As before, stimulate yourself as closely as possible to the point of ejaculation and then stop until control is regained. Begin by stopping three times before going on to ejaculate, then gradually increase the number of stops to six per session.
13.Once you feel comfortable, include a partner.
If you are in a relationship, ultimately you need to bring your partner into the exercises. Don’t rush this, but once you feel confident with your ability to know when to stop and wait until you regain control, you can involve your partner in the exercises.
1.Don’t ever try to stop ejaculation once it has begun. If you go past that point, just let yourself ejaculate.
2.Try to use fantasy only as much as you need to. Because of the starting and stopping, you might need it to get yourself aroused again, but once you are turned on, try to focus back on your body and how it feels.
3.If you usually masturbate by rubbing your pelvis against something, try to use a stroking method. For these exercises, this makes it easier. If you have to change your usual method for the exercises, take a few sessions to get comfortable with this new method.
4.Some men find Kegel exercises help them both by increasing their knowledge of their sexual response, but also the Kegel squeezing can return a feeling of control when you are approaching the point of no return.
5.As you go on to each new step you may find yourself losing some of the control you have developed. This will happen, but if you keep practicing you’ll continue to progress.